Post Christmas Post

Christmas was a rousing success. My boys have again proven that electronics+y chromosomes=entertainment. The older two got PS2 games and movies. Youngest ds got a leapster. We have hardly seen them since. Mel recieved an aquadoodle which I've caught all of them drawing on, L got a fur real kitten and E got money. I took her and a friend shopping yesterday. She got a cord jacket, a hoodie, 3 t-shirts and a cami and 3 pair of earrings for $80 which I thought was very good. Today I took the kids swimming at the Y just to get them some exercise. They all now look glazed over and want to know when dinner will be ready. I can't believe their break is almost over. They go back Jan 2 and didn't get out until Dec 22. I like them being home and 9 days break just doesn't seem like enough.

From Our Home to Yours

Merry Christmas

Solstice

The Shortest Day

And so the Shortest Day came and the year died
And everywhere down the centuries of the snow-white world
Came people singing, dancing,
To drive the dark away.
They lighted candles in the winter trees;
They hung their homes with evergreen;
They burned beseeching fires all night long
To keep the year alive.
And when the new year's sunshine blazed awake
They shouted, revelling.
Through all the frosty ages you can hear them
Echoing behind us - listen!
All the long echoes, sing the same delight,
This Shortest Day,
As promise wakens in the sleeping land:
They carol, feast, give thanks,
And dearly love their friends,
And hope for peace.
And now so do we, here, now,
This year and every year.
Welcome Yule!

Susan Cooper

Argh! People are coming tomorrow. I'm not ready!

Traditions

There was a discussion earlier in the month about family traditions. I, following my tradition, was ignoring Christmas at that point but now I'm beginning to feel festive so here goes:

I would like to say we have a lovely Advent Calendar tradition but truthfully, we skip 3 or 4 days until someone remembers it and then they stick all the stuff up at once to catch up.

I've tried to read Christmas stories in the evening before, no takers here.

I know some families make an occasion out of the tree. I have to beg mine to decorate it.


BUT, we do these things

1) Eat far too much sugar. This is especially extended to Christmas morning where breakfast is traditionally all your sock candy. Lunch and dinner are often cake, cookies and more candy for the kids.

2) On Christmas Eve evening we go to church, come home and I force them to watch A Charlie Brown Christmas. This gets harder every year but I must do this for me.

3) Every gift must be wrapped, not necessarily in actual Christmas paper, but it must be secreted. We open in turns, youngest to oldest, one at a time. This keeps Christmas morning lasting for more than 30 seconds.

4) Bleary mama and tired daddy will indulge in mimosas all morning in an attempt to stay jolly.

Dh's family lives hours and hours from us. We usually do see my brother, dad and families somewhere around Christmas but on that day my brother goes to SIL's parents and my dad and his wife go to her dd's, so it's just us. That is why we can drink!

Oh, and I always save some presents back for 12th night when we have a king cake and chalk the door. I like making the season last and 12th night is something hardly anyone does so that makes them feel special.

Fight, for your Right, to Paaaarty

We went to dh's Christmas party Saturday night. It was a good time, good music and surprisingly a good band. We hadn't done a strictly adult evening together since, oh, probably last Christmas. Do we live exciting lives or what? I've been making gifts in a jar to give to all the people you owe a gift to but don't really want to buy something for. I try not to do this until after they have given me something of course. This years gifts are cinnamon pancake mix and hot cocoa mix with Christmas marshmallows. This is how those of us whose own family eats the cookies and candies as fast as you can make them give food. Our neighbors sent a nice plate of food on Sunday and it is long gone. I got one stinking piece of toffee. I'm living with locusts. I also hope tonight to go full court press on wrapping. We remove those *&#% twisty ties and put batteries in everything. My kids are all about instant gratification and will not be waiting Christmas morning for me to do that. No siree. The Colts are playing the Bengals tonight so I will send the kiddies to bed, put on the game, crack open a beer and hopefully not throw tape and scissors at the TV.

More Chrismassy

I wrestled the tree into place and today the kids will decorate it. The house smells like some mountain village of my imagination with evergreens and cinnamon (from breakfast) in the air. Last night was very laid back. I've been busy in the evening for two solid weeks. All I had to do last night was pick E up at 11:30 from decorating for the Christmas dance. That made it seem like the evening was free.

Relaxed Dining


The Cutest Elf

Eleven Long Years

Yesterday C turned eleven. It is a testament to my superior mothering that he has made it to this age alive and also a testament to the human desire to pass on their genetic material that I haven't personally killed him. He didn't have a party since he suffers from December birthday syndrome in which his parents are busy and so are those of all his friends. After Christmas I will take him and a friend laser tagging instead. What to say about C. If you ever wondered what that really brilliant but odd mathematics professor was like as a child I now know. He really is very, very bright but dealing with people, lets just say if he goes into medicine it better be anesthiology so all his patients will be asleep and won't notice his bedside manner. He asked for an alarm clock for his birthday. I was happy to deliver. Cheapest gift I'll buy all year, LOL.

The Birthday Cake


The Birthday Boy

Christmas Prep

I hope you weren't waiting for a list of what I've got done. It is a very short list. I have however, got in lots of what I consider the real fun of Christmas. I've been caroling with Cub Scouts and Brownies, attended a Brownie Christmas party, purchased a tree and bought hot chocolate (said tree is laying in the garage. I'm considering just celebrating out there and avoiding actually finding time to set up the tree and decorate it) and we've been to story time with Santa. The kids have eaten dozens of gingerbread men and a buttload of fudge. I also have hope that Santa (the one who drives a brown truck and comes to the door) will soon have presents on site.

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

Monday I made a fire. Big mistake! I'm not sure if the flue is blocked or the wind was wrong or what but man oh man did I fill the house with smoke. Of course we went into stupid sitcom family mode. The smoke detectors were going nuts, I'm opening the windows to the freezing air, dh is cursing, and the kids sit oblivious, spellbound by Bart and Homer. Dh ignored my suggestion to take the fire out in the coal bucket and hit it with a fire extinguisher. I never knew how much that stinks. I ended up taking stuff out anyway but got the added bonus of stench to go with the smoke. I've spent Tuesday and Wednesday washing curtains, shampooing carpets, cleaning upholstery, mopping floors, washing walls, blah, blah, blah. It is better but still smells like we might be preserving pork products in our living room. At least I had no Christmas decorations up to move and my house will be sparkly clean for the holidays. Maybe if I burn enough candles or serve enough rum no one will notice the odor.

The kid's who were home did this Friday night.

E had a debate all day Saturday. She is arguing Varsity now. She was gone from 6am to 6pm. A long day. I made cookies, which though hidden, have disappeared. How can they eat five batches of cookies? We went to church Sunday morning and then dh went to pick up S from his friends. I spent far too long trying to find pants for L that were both long enough and didn't fall down. We finally found two pair that came with belts. Sunday night we watched a truly horrible movie called The Librarian but had a blast because we cracked on it ala Mystery Science Theater 3K

Like Little Elves

Yesterday was a half day of school. Why they didn't schedule that half day for last Wednesday I don't know, but anyhoo.
E took it into her head to hand make Christmas cards. I guess now I'll have to send some. The weather has been unseasonably warm (that's info, not complaining) so the others played outside. C and S walked to the scout cabin and river and brought me back pinecones. I am to use them to decorate. Um, have they noticed that their mother is sadly lacking in artistic ability? I gave L and A (who I babysit) glitter and glue and now they are beautiful. I think I'll be really creative and sit them in a bowl on the piano, lol. The church gave us a really nice felt advent calendar so I don't need to download one. It seems like Christmas will get itself taken care of without to much effort on my part. I never decorate too much and like to wait until after the middle of the month to go buy a tree. That is one of our few traditions. We gotta have a real tree! I usually get it up around the 20th. If I had to look at decorations for a month before Christmas I would be sick of them. I did click away with my mouse and get some shopping done. I don't really like shopping. It occurred to me that what I really don't like is too much choice. It's wonderful to have so much to choose from but then I dither about whether it's exactly right, and the best price and if somewhere or something else is better. Very frustrating! I would rather be frustrated at home with a cup of coffee however, than in an actual store.

Putting The Fun in Dysfunctional

A typical American family after a holiday-Possessed, Drunk, Frightened or Angry

A successful Thanksgiving. The weather could not have been better. It was sunny and probably 45 degrees. The kids all played outside ALOT-cops&robbers, capture the flag, soccer, football, tag--they were tired and that was a good thing. We had plenty to eat but not a crazy amount, more like a good Sunday dinner. We took it easy today. We went to the library and I finally raked the leaves and trimmed the hedge. Yes, I know summer and autumn have passed, but I didn't want to rush into anything :=)

The younger contingent taking a break from running around like idiots.


A killer game of euchre. It's a Hoosier thing.

Preparation

No one wants to attend Thanksgiving without appropriate make up and manicure.

And a pedicure would be important too.

Conglomeration

I have about 17 different posts floating around in my head, but no way to make one coherent one appear.

I went on the annual Cub Scout Food Drive Saturday, which always makes me feel good. I hope my boys learned something from the experience. I pointed out to them that the most generous givers were not always those who lived in the nicest homes or had the nicest cars parked out front.

Dh is working on Thursday but the kids and I are going to my dad's and his wife's house. I'm not sure what to bring. No one will commit to what they are making, argh! I think I'll go with a pumpkin roll and cookies for all the kids (ok, except for one all the kids are mine, but you know.)

I tried to find Thanksgiving paper plates today to send to F's kindergarten feast on Wednesday. I had to go to three different stores before I found some. I was thinking I would have to resort to drawing hand turkeys on each individual plain paper plate. (Yes, they were specific that they be Thanksgiving plates.)

I need to think about what to get the kids for Christmas. I've had no requests for anything, and when I ask they say they don't know. This of course makes me think that they must already have enough stuff so why bother. Have I mentioned how much I loathe Christmas shopping? I have a feeling that the oldest two have asked for nothing because they think maybe we can't afford it. We have had some unexpected bills but I don't want them to be all noble and stuff.

I am shocked that no one is slowing down for the long holiday weekend. We have all our regular activities, with extra church thrown in, except Cub Scouts which happens on Thursday. I had a couple boys ask me if we were meeting. Umm, no, I plan on being in a food coma.

Which brings me to a worry. I've lost 26 pounds since April. I know it's not possible to gain them all back in one day, but it's bugging me. Not to mention that every weekend through New Years is already booked with some event. I'm hoping for lots of strength.

Have You Ever

I got this from Paula at Full of Life.

Have you Ever?
01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
*03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
*06. Held a tarantula
*07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
*08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
*11. Visited Paris
*12. Watched a lighntening storm at sea
*13. Stayed up all night and watched the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
*15. Gone to a huge sports game (and survived the crush afterwards)
*16. Walked the stairs up the Leaning Tower of Pisa
*17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
*19. Slept under the stars
*20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
*22. Watched a meteor shower
*23. Gotten drunk on champagne
*24. Given more than you can afford to charity
*25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
*26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
*30. Had a snowball fight
*31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
*32. Held a lamb
*33. Seen a total eclipse
*34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
*36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
*38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
*41. Taken care of someone who was drunk.
*42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
*45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe.
*47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
*49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
*53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
*56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
*59. Lounged around in bed all day
*60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
*62. Kissed in the rain
*63. Played in the mud
*64. Played in the rain
*65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
*68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
*69. Toured ancient sites
*70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
*72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
*77. Made cookies from scratch
*78. Won first prize in a costume contest
*79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
*82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
*83. Got flowers for no reason
*84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
*88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
*90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
*92. Buried one/both of you parents
*93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
*95. Performed in Rocky Horror(in the aisles)
*96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
*102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
*110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
*116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
*117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
*118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
*123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
*127. Eaten sushi
*128. Had your picture in the newspaper
*129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
*130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
*132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read the Iliad-and The Odyssey
*135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
*138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
*141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
*142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
*146 Dyed your hair
*147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
*149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

I guess my life has been more interesting than I thought.

Nothing New

As usual, a week has gone by and that pesky real life got in the way of posting. Nothing too awesome, just the usual detritis of life I blather on about here. I did get alot of batch baking done that I wanted to take care of. I would rather get everything dirty once and freeze the extra than make a little every day. I made lots of bread, muffins, cookies and cup cakes so there is no carbohydrate shortage on the horizon here. I also ordered wood and got it all stacked. I fixed a couple loose shingles. I ran the kids to all their stuff. Saturday E had to be at the high school at 6:45 to make the bus for her debate meet. That made for an early day. (She got 1st place in novice congress by the way. I knew she was a good arguer). Since I was up and around I took the other kids to the free movie. The local theater plays a kid's movie Saturday mornings. We saw Over the Hedge which pleasantly surprised me as being amusing. Usually if I'm not stupefied when I leave I consider it a victory. We spent the rest of the day tucked inside with a fire. It was ugly and cold. Sunday was church and Brownies in the afternoon. This week probably won't be any more exciting. I did finally buy a new digital camera this morning. I need to get it out and read the instructions. Yeah right.

Taking My Day of Rest

Well, I have now handed over most of dh's check to the shoe store. I have purchased four pair this weekend. What happened to the days when sneakers were the cheap shoes? They really needed them though. The least anyone's shoe size increased was a size and a half. You would think they would have mentioned that their shoes were too tight. C's had actual holes in the bottom. Did he tell me this? Duh! I was quite shocked when I had to buy S size 12 men's shoes. Your shoe size shouldn't match your age. His foot is now bigger than dh's. My gosh!!

Yesterday was a full day too. Dh dropped E off at the high school at 7am. It was her first debate match. Eight students participated in her forum and she placed fourth. Not bad for a freshman in her first debate. While dh did that I dropped off S for a Boy Scout bike event. They biked a 27 mile river greenway. After I dropped him off I took F,L and C to sign up for basketball. We changed leagues this year. I just felt where they were playing was ridiculously competitive. It's just kids recreational basketball for heaven's sake, not the NBA. I have no illusions that they are going to win a scholarship, this is for fun. The league we changed to also has Saturday games so no more running around like crazy during school nights. I have enough we are committed to then already. Hopefully this will lead to less stress. S opted not to play this year. He thinks he would like to try swimming at the school. That's alright by me. E is just too consumed with her grades, student council, dance and now debate. I think not playing was probably a good decision for them.

Dh took the older three to see a movie this afternoon. The Prestige. Sounded boring to me so I'm hanging out reading and drinking tea. That's really my perfect day anyway.

In Defense

I'm feeling the need to defend my favorite holiday. Anybody remember Thanksgiving??? I knew I was in trouble when I had to shop for Halloween candy among the trees and reindeer but geesh, every magazine, commercial, pop up ad, etc seems to be for Christmas. Along with articles on how to make it memorable, perfect, awe inspiring and stress free? Huh? Give me a day that involves eating, napping, sports or family games, oh and gratitude and I'm good.

Halloween Happenings

Well between town Halloween festivals, teen parties, church bonfires, and pre-school parties I'm holidayed out before it's even here. Everyone seems to be having fun and I just keep making all the junk disappear when they go to bed.

I've been trying to buy a new treadmill. I've had no luck. After much research Dh decided on a model, and low and behold now it is discontinued. I'm looking again.

I'm also arguing with the insurance company. I suspect they are in cahoots with either the blood pressure medicine cartel or the prozac lobby, because you need on or the other after speaking to them.

It is time for basketball sign ups. Argh, just argh!

For the record, my 5yo is adorable. He's been calling my ma'am. Then he says "How do you like that ma'am stuff ma'am. You like it, huh? huh?

Last question: Who decided six kids, six pumpkins and sharp, pointy implements would be a good idea?

Twenty Years Ago Today

The weather was cold and stormy and my now dh had the flu. I wondered if universal karma was trying to send me a message. It seemed we had not chosen a propitious day for marriage, but here we are. Not bankrupt, not abusive, not having affairs, even sharing a bedroom. Dr. Phil and Oprah would find us unique, LOL. Anyway, Happy Anniversary to us.

Top Five Reasons I'll Keep DH
1) He goes to work everyday so I don't have to.
2) He makes sure I have an ice scraper and candy bars in the glove box come winter.
3) We have good "chemistry".
4) He bought into the 'let's have six kids' logic.
5) He tactfully refrains from pointing out my possibly annoying habits.

Slowing Down?

Why do I always think that things are going to slow down. I guess I've got a flat learning curve on that one. What has been going on? No surprise trips to Europe or anything. L was sick until yesterday when her fever FINALLY went away. Six days of fever is miserable. I did take her to the doctor on Friday. They did a quick strep test, but it was negative. I guess it was just some virulent virus.
Friday night I went camping with the Boy/Cub scouts. It was fine if a bit chilly. The boys have good sleeping bags but I had the Kmart/slumber party number. I slept in about three layers, though, and did ok. I. of course, crept out early and got COFFEE!!!!. How do people camp without coffee. (My addiction is a sad thing.)
Saturday evening we went to a bonfire/cookout/Halloween party. We left L home with E who is far too cool to attend this sort of event anyway. The kids who went had a good time playing football, climbing trees and doing the hayride thing. The weather Saturday was great. That of course ended sometime Sunday morning because by the time I got up it was spitting snow. We went to church and then came home and made a fire, watched football and finally gave Mel her cake. She turned three on Friday but we were too busy that day. I had planned on having people over on Sunday but called them and told them they probably didn't want to come to the House of Illmess. I don't think Mel cared at all. She got cake and presents. That is pretty much all you need when you are three. I didn't get any pictures because my digital camera seems to have died. I'll need to get another one, but I don't know when. I keep thinking that if I just push enough buttons it will work again.
Monday morning C vomited all over his sheets. Not my favorite way to be awakened, so he stayed home from school too. Maybe today will be slower? Yeah, right!

Famdemic!

Famdemic is the word coined by S for the family pandemic we are currently experiencing. I seriously think the last time any of the kids were sick was two years ago. I don't think Mel has ever been sick and she turns three on Friday. They have broken that streak however. Some sort of croupy, fevery beasty is making its way through the house. So far E, S and I have been spared but the others have succumbed. It's nothing serious, but you can't send them to school hacking with a 102 fever. Of course the really scary, seal-like coughing, gasping for air stuff is left for 2am. I really detest sitting in a steamy bathroom, checking their nail beds to see if they are cyanotic. I must have missed that page in the parenting brochure. Otherwise things are fine. The weather has been gray and chilly. Since I've been stuck home I've been keeping a nice fire mulling all day. That along with medicinal doses of chocolate and fiction are keeping me sane. Here's hoping others are faring better.

Finale

We have crossed the sports finish line...at least for autumn. Football concluded last week and the boys enjoyed a lock in on Friday night. No word as to whether the coaches enjoyed it. Elementary cross country was to finish Wednesday, but they called the race for snow. Ack! Saturday included the final soccer games and we finished up with that awards ceremony last night. Sigh--made it. Now I'll breathe before basketball (the sport that never ends) begins.
Saturday I went with the Brownies to a Pumpkin Kingdom. I'm proud to say that my group left the corn maze with the same number of girls that entered. My nerves are still laying in shreds somewhere inside. This coming Friday I am supposed to go with my Cub Scours to a Boy Scout camp out. Let us all now bend our knees and plead that the weather warms up, ALOT! Hopefully now that things are slower I will be able to blog more often, though what there will be to talk about if we actually stay home I don't know.

AUTUMN

The morns are meeker than they were,
The nuts are getting brown;
The berry’s cheek is plumper,
The rose is out of town. 20
The maple wears a gayer scarf,
The field a scarlet gown.
Lest I should be old-fashioned,
I ’ll put a trinket on.
Emily Dickinson

We had it today. We wait all year for it. We had that one perfect weather day for autumn we get in Indiana. Lots of sports, laughing, leaves, bright cheeked, sweaty children and pumpkin pie for dessert. Now I only have to wait for the next perfect day in, oh, May.

Random Thoughts

I was a bit shocked to hear F from the living room shouting about condoms. Relax, he meant condors-those big ugly buzzards.

I have lately found myself saying things that make me want to bite off my tongue. Things like:
Because I'm your mother, that's why!
Go out and bring back some cash from the money tree and then we'll talk.
When you are 18 you can pierce and tattoo your whole body, until then you're stuck with ball point pen.

These were things my parents would have said. I am just as weird as my parents. Good Grief!

I've been working on weight loss. I like quotations, thus I have collected weight loss quotes. Another sign I'm weird.




" When life hands you lemons - make lemonade ... and then go find someone whose life has thrown them vodka and have a party!" ~unknown

"Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands and then eat just one of the pieces." - Judith Viorst

"Never eat more than you can lift." - Miss Piggy

"I don't diet. I just don't eat as much as I'd like to." - Linda Evangalista

" Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart." - Erma Bombeck

"By today's beauty standards, of course, Marilyn Monroe was an oil tanker." - Dave Barry

"I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of 789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet." - Erma Bombeck

"Japanese food is very pretty and undoubtedly a suitable cuisine in Japan, which is largely populated by people of below average size. Hostesses hell-bent on serving such food to occidentals would be well advised to supplement it with something more substantial and to keep in mind that almost everybody likes french fries."-Fran Leibowitz

"I don't exercise. If God wanted me to bend over he'd have put diamonds on the floor." - Joan Rivers

"An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed."-AJ Leibling


"When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won't dig them out of the garbage later. Be careful though, because that Raid really doesn't taste that bad." - Janette Barber

Wonderful Weekly Post

Well, it's weekly, I can't vouch for the wonderful part.

* The high point of the weekend was L scoring her teams two goals at soccer. They won 2-1. The weekend also included Boy Scout events, trips to libraries, movies and another family soccer game.

* I took green grapes to my Sunday School class. I thought it was kind of a pathetic offering but the kids went nuts for them. Don't these kids have fruit at home?

* Tonight is open house at the school. I already know all the teachers so it seems like a waste of time, but they are serving ice cream so the kids want to go.

* Paula asked what I'm doing that is so interesting. I'm not sure interesting is the word, but maybe more useful than computer time. Mel is going to preschool two days/week at the YMCA (the days F goes to kindergarten) so I'm working out and/or doing errands and grocery shopping during that time. I've been really trying to step up the exercise so I'm spending more time on my yoga and taking bike rides hauling the trailer with F and Mel. I'm also working on turning the basement into two separate areas because S has decided he'd like his room to be down there. He has his own room now but he wants to move. I joined a book club at the library. I'm doing some professional continuing education and of course there is still laundry, cooking, etc around here. If I spend 3 (ok, or 4 or 5) hours on the computer the other stuff doesn't get accomplished. I'm trying to keep it to an hour/day. As ds pointed out, I think that's plenty of video time for him. I hate it when they are right.

As Advertised

Sunday we had one of those golden days they would advertise in parenting brochures, if there were parenting brochures. Sun, picnicing, family soccer, and for the kids, swimming in REALLY cold water. We finished up the day with milkshakes for dinner and somehow we managed to make it through without anyone being snarly. The worst thing that happened was F asking to see the tennis ball just as it sailed over and hit him square between the eyes. No harm done though, and he referred to it as a 'battle scar' all day.

I won't be blogging much in the coming weeks. The 'puter sucks up too much time and I have interesting things to do. It seems silly to give that time to a machine....but the pull is strong. I think I know where my kids get their love of video games, I'm just as bad with surfing the net.

The Week in Recap (or why I haven't posted)

Mon-
Take dd to first day of preschool. Discover digital camera has died.
Cross country, football and soccer practice
Empty swimming pool
Wash muddy clothes created by swimming pool
Take dd to dentist

Tues-
Take ds to dentist
Return movies and books to library or just buy them and be done
Soccer practice
Middle School Football game
Buy a huge amount of food to fill up football player

Wed-
Take dd to first preschool field trip
Make note I still need to buy new digital camera
Pay exhorbinant fees to dentist and mechanic
Call washer repair man and beg him to come so I can pay him exhorbinant fees
Read letter describing kindergarten son's poor test results and decide whether to send him to extra kindergarten classes
Find and deliver dd to new dance class since former studio closed (after 9 years, sob)
Buy more food while dd dances to replace food inhaled by the walking stomach, er ds

The rest of the week shapes up pretty much the same. No deep analyzation of the world's problems or even new ways to degrime your sink will be found here.

Out Of Commission

Maybe it was the taxing nature of hanging laundry, but I've been out of commission with migraines and the mist that follows. Honestly, if I'm going to be hung over I wish it was more fun getting that way. Of course there were the trips to football games, soccer games,Sunday school, etc. Oh, the excitement just rolls.

I also exercised great restraint in not becoming embroiled in an internet 'debate'. This is hard for me, because in real life I will argue any point into the ground with anyone. I love to 'debate'. (Fight and argue have been suggested terms for it.) I value these internet aquaintances though, and since making nuances clear in writing is beyond my ability, I stayed out of it. Unfortunately my petty self has conducted the argument in my head. It makes one wonder if I will ever grow up, LOL. Will not! Will too! Will not! Will too!

Slow News Day

So this morning I was in the yard hanging clothes when a guy jumps out of his pickup and asks to take my picture. I 'm thinking, strange laundry fetish? Nope, the county newspaper looking for human interest shots. Ok, I say. I figure somewhere in the county there has to be something more interesting than me hanging laundry. NOPE! Guess whose picture made the front page above the fold. And what does that say about how interesting things are here?


E now tells me she'll have to leave school and slink away to Mexico. What could be more horrifying than your mother on the front page, hanging laundry, and identified no less. Oh the horror!

The Kindness of Strangers

A small town has disadvantages which everyone can list, but there are pluses too. Two of them are 1) you know most people and 2) if they have kids, they'll probably be in some of the activities your kids are. I found a ride last night for L to go to soccer practice and a way for S to get from football practice to Boy Scouts. I needed that help so I could take Mel to the Y for some swim classes. They will normally be while F is at kindergarten and give her something to do. I'm working on my clone, but progress is slow.

Not really anything exciting to report. Life is once again about where the kids have to be when. I know some people just say, don't let them do stuff, but it seems that the only way they get to see other kids is in activities. Other kids seem to stay inside all the time, not allowed to play because their parents are at work or at daycare/activities themselves. Each kid only does one activity but times six it adds up. So....if I whine about all the places I need to be at the same time, either put me on ignore or enjoy the fact you aren't the only one going crazy.

School itself jumped into full swing. Homework on the first night and every night since. I'm glad I went to school in the good old dumb days. Again, I k now you homeschoolers would say just avoid school, but as I said earlier, if I did school they'd read and watch tv all day. Bad mommy. So, on we go, hopefully striking a balance between family, social activities and school. If they all turn out to be ax murderers it's not because we didn't try.

I Rock!

After dental fun yesterday, I again tried to sweep the corners of my kitchen and said "Enough!" I've had the new vinyl for a year but it never got trimmed out. Something else always came up...cars,kids, food, shelter. I couldn't stand it anymore and was tired of waiting on others (dh) sooo.... I went to Lowe's, bought cheap prepainted quarter round and did it myself. In two hours. Don't let guys tell you it's a big deal. I am now Mistress of the Mitersaw. (sounds kinky) and my kitchen and bathroom have trim. It's not gorgeous, exotic, finely carved trim, but it's trim darn it! I might also mention I still had time to make a pot roast. I rock! In other news, sensing that I had spent some money, the bearing on my washing machine went out. How do the appliances know????

Finally

Slow progress but I am glad to announce that I now have ONE child who has all her cavities filled. Why , oh why did they have to inherit my crappy teeth? I feel like I have been living at the dentist. I have been to seven dentist appointments and have three more to go. I'm thinking of just direct depositing dh's paycheck into the dentist's bank account. I'm beginning to think his new pool is being financed by us.

Hodge Podge

Just some thoughts on a steamy Sunday night. I have been reading this Reduced Shakespeare: The Attention Impaired Readers Guide Amusing, yet educational (Great taste-less filling).
I also like these sites. They appeal to my extremely trivial mind. (yes, I can remember the main export of Paraguay, but not a dentist appointment.)
For the Lone Ranger Fan
More Shakespeare Fun
Good Girls Kill For Money And I've actually had e-mail contact with one of the writers.
Finally pics. I never had a girly-girl moment in my life, but my girls seem to be that way anyway. All that was missing from the tea party were the scones and cream.


What happens when you don't securely put away the birthday decorations? She even did a hula rendition.

Cake

Really, all my kids need to be happy for a birthday is cake and some cheesy decorations.

Before the chaos. Note, the beer is not for the kids, lol.


With the cake


Eating

Eight is Great

Happy Birthday L. Today she is eight. What to say about L. She is the child I have the hardest time getting along with. Strong willed really doesn't do her justice. A tantrum can easily last eight (how ironic) hours. She has gone 30 hours without eating rather than pick up a pair of socks. Just a tad hard to deal with. I try to remind myself that when she sets a goal she succeeds. Not to paint too grim of a picture, she is also smart, funny and a leader at school. (Probably because everyone is afraid to tell her no, LOL). She is also a very good sister to Mel, letting her play tea party and reading her stories. I'm sure I will be very proud of her someday, if I don't die from exhaustion first.

She was swimming, and when she saw the camera she immediately struck a pose. It is so L.


The birthday kid always gets to pick meals. Her choices today were homemade cinnamon rolls, chocolate m&m cookies for her class at school and spaghetti and garlic bread with cake for supper. It was a very difficult decision whether we would have cake or pumpkin pie.

Back To School

First day of school here. E got on the bus at 6:45am so she was long gone by the time I thought to take pictures. C and S looked at me like I was nuts and set out across the field to walk to school. Pictures are sooo uncool.

F's first day of kindergarten


F, L and Mel. Baby sister is not happy to lose all her playmates.


The diva enjoying her pool. Perhaps she doesn't miss them as much as she thought she would.

Squeezing In Some Fun

On Sunday we took the kids to the zoo. We would have liked to do something more, but the budget and time constraints kept that from happening. We did have great weather, and we let the littles do pony rides and bought lunch there. Does it say something about our family that eating at the zoo was a big deal? Too many picnics on trips?

Monday L had two fillings done. She has two more to go. We did manage to make it through this appointment. She was the child you most want to disown at the last attempt. Gee, now I just have 3 more appointments this week and two next week. I hope the dentist's family is enjoying the lifestyle I'm providing.

C had soccer practice and E went to a high school swimming party. I am amazed at that kid's social life. She could find friends on a deserted island.

Mel has a croupy cough. How do you get that in August? My allergies are driving me crazy. S has to pick up football equipment today. And so the treadmill of activities begins. I want them to be involved, I really do, but it sure seems to involve me. I'm even the mean mom who makes people ride their bike to practice or walk home when possible, and it still seems to involve me. ~Sigh~

Wholesome Midwest Saturday

Went to a festival in my home town today. My dad and brother still live there.

*I watched my kids eat WAY too many pancakes and syrup. Nothing like a little sugar.

*Watched a parade and watched them collect WAY too much candy. Nothing like a little sugar.

*Went to my dad's. Watched them eat WAY too many oreos. Nothing like a little sugar.

*Went to my brother's, watched them get lots and lots of plastic toys from the garage sale leavings. Watched them be hyper.
Wished I had a little alcohol. Hey, doesn't that take sugar?

Pearly Whites

Behold the $5000 smile.

I hope it was worth 7 years of wearing braces and the 3 hour appointment to get them off.

Home School Fantasy

It's that time of year again. The time of year I indulge in a home school fantasy. (The only other fantasy I have is actually finishing a cup of coffee while it is hot.) I see on my visits around blogdom that some schools have actually already started. In the frickin' middle of summer! I thought the 23rd was bad enough.

For the record I hate sending my kids to school. I miss them, and so I fantasize about homeschooling. In the fantasy they read literature, easily pick up math from cooking and trips to the store and salivate at the thought of a trip to the art museum. Alas, I am sure that it would just be more fantasy novels, play station and pictures of monsters drawn in crayon. What I'm really fantasizing about is the relaxed summer atmosphere. Playing cards late into the night, swimming all day, bike rides. No lunch, no baths. (What, a cheese stick and swimming don't count?)

I hate the two weeks leading up to school. Everyone I know feels compelled to ask me if I'm ready for school to start. Don't these people like their kids? Unfortunately I know myself. My attention span is aproximately two minutes long. I would take unschooling to new levels. So, I buy gym shoes and paper and get ready for the take a bath, check homework, check what they put in their lunches slog. But I don't have to like it. And I can still fantasize about keeping them home.

In Response to the Babytalk Cover Brouhaha

I make milk, what's your superpower?

My Boys

They are strange.

My 5yo just spent 15 minutes telling me about Yin Yan Yoh, who is apparently a super bunny, who fights evil with his powers. I believe I got that right. This after he ran around the kitchen with his head in a strainer yelling "Crazy Taxi, crazy taxi" Hmmmm.

My 12yo, who is supposedly bright and mature just explained why it is not his fault the ball bounced off the glass door of the china cabinet. He was aiming for the piano after all. Gee, that makes it all better. What was I thinking?

10yo. Well, he is just generally strange.

Blah

After the excitement of visiting with long lost friends and actually going OUT, I felt blah yesterday. I picked up the dehumidifier from the repair guy. It had approximately two boxes of checkers inside it. This would explain why 1) we can never find the checkers, 2) why it was leaking all over the floor 3) what Mel finds to do in the basement. It rained so I got groceries. It wasn't like we could do anything fun. After tromping around in the rain I felt even more blah. I usually try to cook something reasonably nutritious. This is met with no response. Last night I made canned soup. People were lavish with their praise for the delicious meal. Geesh!

Margaritaville

So I've vacationed, had a high school reunion and tonight I'm going to a Jimmy Buffett concert. This hasn't left much blogging time. I'll leave you with this photo taken at the splash pad. A maintenance guy opened the control's and little Y chromosome carrying types flocked over. Doesn't their posture reflect old guys standing around a tractor. It cracks me up. I can hear them saying "Yup, that there is the whatchamajiggly. Important ya' know."

Who

1) So who was the wise acre who thought up the heat index? Really, once you're up into the '90's does it matter if it "feels" like 104? Hot is hot!

2) Are there really people, who, when it feels like 104 don't know that you should restrict activity and drink plenty of fluids?

3) Why is weather a contest? It's hotter here. It's more humid here. The concrete of the city makes it hotter. We have to make hay in this sun. It's hot people, miserably hot. No matter where you live, no matter what you do, it's hot!

Ok, that's off my chest and I've promised my family I'll quit yelling these things at the tv now!

The Play's The Thing

4-H fair is over and things are settling down here. Tonight E and I are going to see a play here. It ain't broadway but it beats Nicktoons, which is what I usually have to watch on Friday. Every time we go E and L both tell me they want to be in one of the plays, but it takes a huge time commitment and I can't see them giving up all their other activities for one play. Dh is working tonight but then he is off work next week. We aren't going anywhere, just relaxing. S and C need to be taken to camp on Sun and picked up on Fri. In between we can take the youngest three to do all the things the oldest three don't like. I think we'll go to a baseball game too.

Lists

So, when you are this far behind, the only thing to do is a list.

1-strong man show seen with C and F Team Impact
2-number of dental appointments, and number of friends staying at our house
3-hours spent attending the 4-H judging, also number of trips made to the fair
4-number of cavities in L's mouth
5-trips to the beach and pool
6-number of children taken to the orthodontists office, note to self, they only have five chairs

E is spending the week at the fair with her friends. Why you would want to camp out with hogs I'm not sure but there is no accounting for taste. The boys need to get ready to go to camp. I have to take L back to get the four cavities filled. E has an appointment to get molds taken for her retainers. She will be getting her braces off after six years. Did I mention her mouth was really messed up? F has his first dentist appointment so he can go to kindergarten. I have spent two afternoons going through clothes to try and find five nice outfits (that means not torn or stained) to wear to school. I haven't been on the puter much and so I am even behind on everyone elses blog. Somehow I don't think next week will be any better.

Go East, Young Weather Front

It stormed last night, a humdinger of a storm says L. Where do they get those terms? It is now a cool 85. You know it has been far too hot when 85 seems almost too cool to swim. It is hot on the east coast now. My reaction to that , neener,neener,neener.
We spent Sunday in the pool in the back yard. It was too hot to contemplate the beach or a real pool. Dh grilled fish and steaks and veggies for dinner, because if he didn't I was throwing the peanut butter on the table and passing out spoons. I took F for his kindergarten physical this morning. Oooops, it appears the last time I had him at the doctor he was 6mo old. I explained he hadn't been sick, I once again heard tht kids need check ups. I nodded and counted the posters in the room. Surprise, he is healthy! He still has to go to the dentist before they'll let him in school. Why is that? Are they worried about foot and mouth disease? Anyway, quieter here, only the doctor's appointment and Boy Scout awards tonight. I think I'll sit outside and maybe even wear a sweater it's so cool.

I'm Melting or Slip Sliding Away

It is hot, hot, hot and I have been busy, busy, busy.
Yesterday morning I went grocery shopping. It had been a couple of weeks so think two shopping carts. I drug it all home and got it put away, made a quick clean of the house and took off to pick up L from camp. She and E were supposed to be in the 4-H parade but..obviously L wasn't here and E had a softball game. It was so muggy in the woods picking L up and there was a very nice, but very humid worship service before I could bring her home. The odor from her wet, wet clothes was, shall we say, reminiscent of gym class. I dropped her off at home, told her to take a shower and go lay down and ran to E's softball game. It was 9pm by then but... they got a late start because it poured rain for about 10 minutes. That 10 minutes was of course during E's walk to the diamond. Ooops, sorry kiddo. I had a very,very tired A and F with me. The game finally got over about 10:30pm. I came home and got kids to bed and started on the laundry. Gross!
Saturday morning dawned stifling already when I got up at 6:30. I worked some more on L's laundry because I knew S would be coming home with all his stuff today. I begged him a ride home with some other parents so I could be at soccer evaluations at 9:00. Next we ran to the store to get some materials for dd's 4-H Arts&Crafts project. (Have I mentioned my complete lack of the crafting gene?) S was home when we got back so we started on his incredibly nasty laundry while I helped E with hot glue, maribou feathers and beading. By now it was 98. E had a softball game at 3pm. What a crappy time. Even worse than the middle of the night. I took L,F and Mel. We drank all the water I brought and then I bought about 4 bottles more. I really began to worry about Mel, who was beyond sweaty so I got our umbrella to shade us. Yes we looked stupid, but it helped some. They were still playing at 5:30 when I needed to leave to go to L's baseball cookout/party. Poor E was left to walk home. We went to the party for an hour and then headed to the other baseball park to watch F play in the championship t-ball game. It was still beastly hot and they ended up losing by one run. Oh, well! The upshot of all this is that I feel like I have been in a swedish sauna all day without benefit of that refreshing plunge into the icy arctic. It's baths all round here, and perhaps a bracing vodka tonic.

The Zoo with the Animals

It stopped raining, so ignoring the 99% humidity, I took the kids to the zoo. We went early so the heat was a little better. At 11:30 I declared it too hot and we went and ate our picnic lunch. Rather I ate the delectable array of fruits and veggies. They ate peanut butter crackers and went to play on the park equipment. Evidently there was some memo I wasn't privy to that stated that all the healthy foods you eat at home are designated untouchable at a picnic. The evening brought yet another t-ball game. C (Little League) and L (coach's pitch) are out of tourney but of course the t-ball team just keeps on winning. I was kept busy at the game buying freezies to quiet the other children I had drug out into the heat. (They begged to come, didn't want to stay home with their sister)
I got word that the area L and S are in got 9 inches of rain Tuesday night. S is in a tent and I guess they had to make a run to a laundromat about 10 mi away to dry everything out.Today I need to go get L from camp. She and S are only about 10 miles apart but of course he needs picked up Saturday morning. C also has Soccer try outs Saturday morning and dh is working and E's Softball tourney is Saturday. Sigh! Time to power up the cloning machine again.

Quiet On The Home Front

As if to show how fickle Hoosier weather can be, this weekend's beautiful weather has been followed by a rainy Tuesday and Wednesday. We've done puzzles, painted pictures, worked on 4-H projects and generally vegged. DD and I watched Rabbit Proof Fence while the younger set took in Samurai Jack. They can only take so much enrichment without needing a shot of pop culture. I also took C for an eye exam. He is near sighted but the optometrist felt like we should wait 6 months to get glasses because kids this age often have a sudden worsening of vision when they have a growth spurt. I guess you could say he received a reprieve. We are supposed to have tournament t-ball and softball games tonight but I suspect the field will be too boggy. I can't say I'll miss the opportunity to sit outside in 98% humidity. Blech! (May I also say, in a very tiny whisper, I'd really love it if the t-ball season would be done! Pro-bowling may be more entertaining than t-ball) On the other hand, though the national league lost in last night's all star game, at least it was interesting. I was flipping between the game and a program about a man who lived under an assumed identiy for 23 years. Very weird! It was interesting (though the reporting definitely had an overwrought tone) but when the psychiatrist they interviewed blamed the fact he was one of nine children for his sham I came out of my seat! Argh! Maybe he would have been a nut if he was an only child! Ok, rant over.

Hello Mudduh, Hello Fadduh

It's camp time! I took two of the little darlings and dropped them off yesterday. It feels a little like losing a limb to have them gone, but I've heard you can get used to that. Luckily their two camps are close enough that I could drop them both off. Since the family would be parted this week (and there did seem to be alot of glee about that from all parties) we spent Saturday together. The children's favorite restaurant (Ponderosa, yes you read that right, Ponderosa, because quantity of free ice cream is a make or break deal for them) is closing. We all ate far too much buffet and then went to the beach. Ok, the beach is really the reservoir, but this is a landlocked state, ok? I did my minimalist thing. Swim suits, check, sunscreen check! We're ready. I did take a token towel to leave in the van. If it's hot enough to swim, you can air dry in my opinion. Of course Mel decided that day to be scrupulous in her toilet habits and demand to be taken 1/4 mile up a hill to go potty, three times no less! E did manage to keep all the others from drowing while I was gone UP THE HUGE FREAKIN' HILL. Happy, toasty children resulted from the enterprise however, so it was worth it, I guess. I just wish they didn't have those pesky signs about no alcohol. Really, a cool vodka tonic would improve the beach immensely. The only monkey wrench in the day was when S announced that he was packed for camp. A quick perusal of his bags before loading revealed he had packed no socks. Me: "Where are your socks?" S: "I don't have any" Me: "Saturday night at 7:00pm is just a great time to tell me that!"
S: "Well, I'll just wear my shoes without socks. Einstein never wore socks you know." No, I didn't know that, you smarty, smarty pants. Einstein's mother would have objected too if she had just bought new Nike's in men's size 10, 10 for criminy's sake. And not on sale either! Thank you oh shoe gods for letting Dollar General be open until 8 and having socks! Oh, and I forgot to mention the heart rending end Sunday to dropping off L at camp. She's 7. You'd think she might be a little apprehensive, might like a hug right? Oh no, we loaded her bags onto the camp wagon, she looks at me and says "You can go now mother." "How about a hug and a kiss" says I. She rolled her eyes and ran off to find her counselor. Eeeek!

Everyday Life

My everyday life is painfully dull to write about (it really isn't so bad to live). Here's the update.

Last night C's baseball team lost their tournament game 7-6. Much pouting followed. Now I just have three teams left playing. On the bright side E's softball team won 17-3. This did not relieve C's pouting of course.

I have a dentist appointment this morning. I loathe the dentist. My parents took me to a guy straight from Little Shop of Horrors as a kid. He didn't believe in using novacaine for kids. Can we say lifelong trauma?

I must get to town to get soap, toothpaste, etc for S and L to take to camp next week. It is going to be weird to have two of them gone at once. L is going to church camp and S to Boy Scout camp.

One of the courses S is taking is Wilderness Survival. The kid can barely cope with everday survival. This should be amusing. I think he's watched far too many episodes of "I Shouldn't Be Alive" and wants to be prepared.

E has started on her 4-H projects. They are due next week. Wouldn't want to rush or anything.

I Never Imagined:

Shopping is really about 14yo dd talking, and talking and talking to me.
That dh and I are lenient parents. I thought we had some good rules going.
That a ball game would make 10 yo ds hold my hand for a minute (in the dark, of course, where no one can see).
That my ds would only have to be 12 to be my height.
That 7 yo dd can eat her whole Bob Evans breakfast and most of mine.
The beach, pool and splash park can all be visited in the same week and still not be boring, at least to my kids.
That supposedly responsible, adult men should not be allowed to go buy fireworks alone.

Have a Happy Independence Day!

Friendly Confines

Though Tut looked alluring at the Field Museum and Leonardo was doing his best work at Science and Industry, and Navy Pier exuded energy, we went on to Mecca, oops I mean Wrigley Field. And miracle of miracles CUBS WIN!!

Now it's back to the baseball that predominates my regular life.

A place where all that natural competiveness and agression can do some good. Catch that ball and fire it to second!

The Sun Did Not Shine

It was too wet to play. Ok, actually it was only that way from 2pm on. The morning was nice but humid and hot. The afternoon though, Whew! It really blew. The neighbors' trees (3 in all) came down and we lost alot of shingles from the house and garage. Power was out for awhile too. E and L were at Girl Scout Day Camp. They had to move the girls to shelter. Of course dh was supposed to pick them up, and because he is a technophobe (Luddite actually) I couldn't reach him. He does have a cell phone, but doesn't turn it on. I've told him that makes it a paper weight, but I digress. At any rate that, and the fact that his car died, made him rather unpleasant last night. He has taken this coming week off. I hope his mood improves because I really don't need a week of grumpiness. I got on the roofs this morning and reshingled the bad spots so hopefully that will help. We aren't going anywhere but I'd like to take the kids to the community pool or the reservoir or something. Hopefully we're done with high winds.

Savoring the Moments

Friday I went to a professional conference. I left dh a schedule of where he needed to be with whom and when. It took a whole page of notebook paper. He was busy from 7-7. He seemed shocked. Bwahahaha! Welcome to my world.

Hail and baseball are a poor combination. At what point do we adults lose the thrill of "raining ice cubes" and refrain from dancing among the stinging pellets?

DS's comments after spending three days counseling at Cub Scout camp. "Geesh, those little kids really wear you out." Again, welcome to my world.

As a point of future reference, do not put my 5yo anywhere near a microphone. Especially in church. He will cradle it and sing into it like he's on American Idol.

Do not let oldest DD comment aloud on 5yo ds. "Thank you, thank you very much! He'll be here all week!"

Do not have a mother who finds them both amusing, it will only encourage them.

Huh?

"Such a mature girl."
"He is such a help, especially with the little boys."
"Definitely full of drive."

Who are these people and what have they done with my chilren? Where are the pods? E and S are helping with Girl Scout daycamp and Cub Scout daycamp respectively. C is just attending. Why can't they show these qualities at home? Because they know I HAVE to keep them, no matter what, that's why. They told me so.

Feels Good

It feels like we will finally be starting summer here this week. The kids have been playing baseball but frankly, we are one of those sort of hyper families that likes to have bunches going on. The really fun stuff starts this week. This week E is counseling at Girl Scout camp, Bible school is this week, we continue swim lessons, C will go to Cub Scout Day camp, S helps set up day camp today and tomorrow and we continue baseball (if it finally quits raining). Next week L goes to daycamp along with E. The week after that dh is taking off. I've scheduled a bunch of physicals the kids will need in the fall, so 3 MD appointments that week. It you wait until Aug there are no appointments to be had. That weekend before the 4th is our town festival so lots going on: parades, carnival games, water games, rodeo, demolition derby, etc. The week after that L goes to church camp and S goes to Boy Scout camp. Then I'll help them rush to get 4-H projects done. The following week is the fair and C and S go to church camp. That leaves two weeks until school starts and S and E will have summer band those two weeks. I'm sure we'll do other stuff too. We've gotta fit in some lightning bug catching, camping, trips to the pool, zoo, children's museum, etc., and I just got an e-mail that my class reunion will be going on in Aug. I'll have to decide if I want to go to that, we'll see. The only reason to go would be to see the about 10 people I liked in high school, LOL!

Better days here.

Jody, thank you for the kind comments.

kmom,Jody, and Chris, et. al. Congrats on *largerfamilies

*Congrats to *mabear on #12

*Rain today puts us at 4 games on Saturday. Of course now that the field is under water the sun is shining.

*While it was raining I was persuaded to play Go Fish (or Gold Fish as they call it). This was made even more tedium inducing by playing with a 5yo who doesn't know his numbers, a 7yo who insists on calling the 5yo moron, and a 2yo trying to climb on my head. The following game of Crazy Eights seemed enthralling by comparison.

One Of Those Days

Do you ever feel you have your own thunderstorm lurking over your family? Yesterday I did.
L and F were to begin swimming lessons. L loves the water, jumps off the diving board, etc. but for some reason she decided she did not want to go. I got her in the car screaming all the way. She had a Linda Blair worthy fit by the pool. No amount of calm was going to reach her. I took her out, with many eyes staring at me. She did not calm down. If anything she became more loud and unreasonable. Now, if it had just been her I would have left but F was still in the water. It was quite a show. And I admit right here, this is childish, but I hate the other parents staring at me with that "what an imcompetant mother" look in their eyes. It was a very long 45 minutes. Mel pointing and chanting "naughty, naughty" didn't help either. Dh came home in the early afternoon to report his car is stalling and he needs replacement fillings in two teeth. He was not what I would call cheery. The backdrop for all this was 12yo and his snarky attitude. I can only conclude he finds himself wry or dry witted. I mostly found him annoying. At least the 14 yo is pleasant. Of course you only see her for 15 minutes a day as the rest of her time is spent shut up in her room. I'm beginning to suspect vampirism. At 9pm I delcared it bedtime for all. I just couldn't be nice anymore. They needed to remove themselves or it was going to get UGLY.

Great Big Brownie Smile

Today was the end of the year Brownie meeting.

Singing in a Brownie Circle


Rare photo of me taken by E


Yesterday included three baseball games. Why do they try to make up rain outs? Picked up S from Boy Scout camping trip. Eeeew! They swam in the river and their clothes stunk! Along with the usual taking care of the yard and the pool and feeding the troops that was about it for the weekend. I've gotta win a sweepstakes to Paris or something!

Hot Fun in the Summertime

A real back seat driver


A day in the pool has almost gotten rid of all the marker tattoos so she no longer looks like a Maori tribesman. And it's more fun than a bath.

I Don't Even Really Like Green

You Are Teal Green

You are a one of a kind, original person. There's no one even close to being like you. Expressive and creative, you have a knack for making the impossible possible. While you are a bit offbeat, you don't scare people away with your quirks. Your warm personality nicely counteracts and strange habits you may have.

What Color Green Are You?

Strang habits? Quirks? Say it ain't so

Happy Memorial Day

We've played too hard the past few days. I am tired. We've been to cookouts, birthday parties, and Minor League ball games,(just in case t-ball, coaches pitch, little league and girl's softball weren't enough). I've replaced roof shingles, set up the pool, been running with E, planted flowers and unbelievably bought myself a few clothes. I don't like to shop but even dh was noting the sad shape of my summer stuff. I remember buying stuff after C was born 9 years ago and not really since. I was pregnant three of those summers, some people gave me some stuff,etc. and I just never bought much. Probably a couple polo shirts and a pair of khakis for church but I went a little crazy on Saturday. I got a swimsuit, khaki skirt, khaki shorts, three tank tops and a purple peasant blousy thing. It was a good sale though, I thnk I only spent like $50. I hope it lasts nine more years, LOL! Today I'm going to drop the oldest three to see X-Men 3 and take the younger three to a park. A shady park. Yesterday's baseball game in 95 degree heat has left me a little wilted.

School's Out!!

*Whenever I say school's out, I sing that stupid Alice Cooper song in my head

*The kid's did really well.

*E graduated 8th grade with the highest GPA in the class. C got straight As. S got 3 As and 3Bs. His siblings are ridiculing him, lol!

*L in first grade gets numbers. She got 1s. Do they think kids can't equate 1s with As?

*Swimming can now count as a bath.

*It doesn't matter if we can find socks.

*They can wear the jeans that have the leg held on by a thread.

*If the baseball game goes on until 10:30 it's ok.

*They have plenty of time to get their chores done.

*I LOVE SUMMER!!

Dwarves

I thought I was living with children, but this weekend brought me to the realization that they are actually height challenged beings from a Disney movie (except only six live here, Bashsful undoubtedly stayed in Hollywood). We have Busy, Mouthy, Whiny, Twitchy, Grouchy and Spock (who has calculated exactly how many days of school are left until he graduates. He was quite put out when he tried to figure out his undergrad, Master's and Doctoral program and I explained it would vary.)

For Mom

Today would have been my mom's 79th birthday. She died 13 years ago when I was pregnant with S. My mom wasn't like all the other moms. She didn't sew, she didn't decorate, she didn't wear makeup. She worked a full time job my whole childhood. What she did do was teach me to throw a softball, hit a lay up and stand up for myself. She was a tomboy in the '30's when that was not a good thing. She and dad were married 14 years before I was born. It was the '60's when no one knew why some people just didn't conceive. Who knows why she suddenly got pregnant with me or my brother two years later and that was it. She was 35 when I was born, practically ancient back then. She always made me feel like I was a long awaited present and not some horrible suprise foisted on her. She knew how to not offer her advice unless asked and mop up the pieces when her advice would have helped me avoid a screw up. I still miss her.

Noah, Noah

Hurry up on that ark already! I am sick unto death of rain. It's been raining for 8 days. Yesterday it held off until 5:35. I of course had unloaded my kids at the park for a ball game at 5:30. Right now it is very dark and windy, another thunderstorm will probably hit at 1:00pm,since that is when the library opens.

E left for her 8th grade trip on yesterday morning at 6:30am. Tonight they are supposed to have dinner on a cruise on the Ohio river. I hope the weather their is better for them. This weekend should be really busy if it stops raining. Ball pics and practices, dance dress rehearsal, dance recital and brownie meeting. On the bright side Tuesday is the kids' last day of school. Yeah!! No more lunch packing, school events, meetings,etc. I'm looking forward to it as much as they are.

Cwush

Sometimes, kids just crack me up. Today's humorous observation concerned my 5yo's comments about 14yo dd's friend. Megan came in and gave F a big hug. He turned to me and said in earnest "She has a cwush on me. I wiw be gentwe with herw". Where did he hear that phrase? Later today he couldn't get his jacket zipped, he sighed and cursed "Oh, snickerdoodle!" Ah, at least it seems to be the worst word he knows right now.

Soggy Weekend Notes

Friday
* darn, ball games cancelled Friday night, I so wanted to sit in the rain on damp bleachers again

Saturday
* maybe I should have qualified that wish for rain
* Hoodwinked was just ok, glad we saw it at the free movie

Sunday
*still raining
*children express surprise that today is Mother's Day
*dh, aka gloomy gus, offers to take me out to eat, all restaurants are full, end up with a burrito
*do grocery shopping while I'm out

Monday
*enough of the rain already
*what kind of control freak am I, why should dh's mood effect mine? but it does darn it, quit griping already (yes, I see the irony there)

WWYD

So say it's a 40 degree, rainy day. Would you spend 3 1/2 hours sitting on damp wooden bleachers, hunched into your winter coat, watching your blue limbed youngster in tank top and shorts circle a track endlessy? Of course you would, because you are a parent.

Officially Beyond Redemption

Getting a mini-van was lowering, getting the 15 passenger van was a sure step towards geezerdom, but this proves my cool card is gone and I'm beyond coolness redemption


On the plus side, I no longer worry that A is going to launch herself sideways in the baby carrier seat and send us both to a bloody meeting with the road. It also has the added benefit of letting F ride along if, say, I want to get somewhere minus the minute by minute stops to observe something interesting or the stomach grabbing nausea when I wonder if he'll get braked before shooting out in front of a car.

Not much else going on here. I took F and A to the zoo Monday. They imitated the orangutangs, loudly, for a loooong time, all through the zoo. They had a wonderful time, but really, I think people were ready for us to leave. We ate sandwiches and gold fish at the park and they played. Amazing how nice it is when 1) some older child isn't rolling his/her eyes at the horror of being at the zoo or 2) pleading for ice cream/hot dogs/popcorn. because you know that is only good when overpriced. The same thing at home is just dull. Duh!

Bits & Pieces

Bits and pieces is what I feel like I have left after a hectic week. One more week of craziness and then things slow down.

* This may be the only graduation this one ever attends so let's enjoy the pic.

He is staring to the side because that was where the cookie table was located. I spent all day reminding him to sing loud and speak clearly. Big mistake! He shouted all the words. No problem hearing him. It's never good when afterwards people smile and tell you what a "character" your kid is.

* S survived three track meets this week and is spending the weekend camping with Scouts

* E survived three major school presentations and is going to an all night party both Friday and Saturday night

* L is invited to a skating birthday party on Saturday and a swimming one next week

* who are these people who throw elaborate parties for their kids?

* may a curse be upon all parents who take their dd to Build-A-Bear and pay $50 for a $3 stuffed animal and thus make your dd lust for same

*this weekend also includes three baseball practices and a brownie meeting

*how come I get so tired of running them around and listening to the bickering but it is TOO quiet when three are gone at once?

Boringly Busy or Busily Boring

I haven't posted because things have been busy, yet yawninly mundane to read about. Sunday we took the kids swimming. Monday I had a migraine and did nothing. E had to walk F to T-ball practice and S had a track meet. Tuesday was track practice, L had ball practice, E had dance and S had to be in the next town 18 miles away for a Boy Scout meeting. He's a patrol leader and they were planning this weekend's campout so he had to go. E and L ended up walking again. Tonight is F's pre-school graduation, S has a track meet and E has ball practice. Can you hear me panting trying to keep up? Dh is working evenings so it's just me. How mean is it to make your kid walk home from a track meet at 8pm? I'll figure it out. See very boring to read about but it prevents us from doing anything interesting to blog about!
Oh, and even more boring minutae. How come the kid who looks like she hasn't grown at all (did I mention she's the one I ignore) has absolutely no shorts or shirts that don't look like they are owned by Daisy Duke, not that a 7yo Daisy Duke might not be cool. Argh, I might have to go to a store! Yucky, yucky, yuck!!!!!

Did They Run Out Of Students?

Our family must have it's star in the right house or something because not a month after C won an award E got one yesterday. The Optomist Club gave her the 2006 Youth Achievment Award for service to her school, community and fellow students. Pretty cool! She met it with the same non-smiling countenance she meets everything, lol! Of all the people in the world, there is a real irony that the OPTOMISTS gave her an award. The kid is the poster child for pessimism.

It is nice to know somebody noticed how hard she works and how much she has done at school. She has spent more time in the special ed room helping others than the special ed kids have studying there.

How To Look Like An A**

First, walk down the steps at the stadium and trip. Fall in a heap. Hold just purchased beer aloft, so while head and back make contact with concrete only a small amount of beer spills on your head. Get up and continue down aisle to seat. Have dh lose balance and grab you, sending you into next row of box seats (luckily unoccupied). Spill more beer on self, twist knee and bang head. Note that though you are stumbling around and smell like a brewery you have yet to even taste your beer. Unless you count the drips running down your face. Argh!

Annoying+Tagged

So today, oh four days after taxes are due, dh's 401K sent me a check and a letter saying that we saved too much. Ok, now I'm penalized for too much saving? And I get to figure out how to file an amended return. Blech!

This week consisted of four parent/teacher conferences, four baseball practices, two track meets, dance picturesand two cub/boy scout meetings. Oh the excitement.

I was tagged by Melissa. I'm supposed to tell you six things about myself. If you've read here much you already know all about me but here goes (since the inspiration well is dry)

1) I was once very bright. I got my MS with a 4.0. My brains have since dehydrated into a tiny pea that rattles around my skull.

2) I love to read. When I was in high school and college I read great literature. Now I mostly read excapist fair. Best book I've read lately. Cod by Mark Kurlansky. Strangely interesting story of a fish and culture.

3) I missed the girly gene and have no idea how to decorate or do my hair.

4) I like sports, beer and nachos.

5) I am a Sunday school teacher. I try not to bring beer and nachos to class.

6) I was 30 when I had my first baby. If I had started 10 years earlier I could have fit in six more, and been very happy about it.

Terrific Kid

Last night C received an award from the Kiwanas for being a Terrific Kid. This was huge for him. He has really struggled with the social aspects of school. He is easily frustrated and impatient. Not a great personality for public school. They had a lovely buffet for the winners and their guests. He was trying to be so careful and watch his manners it was painful for me to watch. He was so tense trying to remember to chew quietly, not drop things and keep the napkin in his lap. He got dressed up and was sooooo proud. Only one student is chosen from each grade school for the year so he should be proud.
Here he is wishing he could drop through the floor. He didn't know he'd have to talk.

Here is C and dh. They both clean up pretty well.

By the way, the terrific stands for:Thoughtful Enthusiastic Respectful Responsible Inclusive Friendly Inquisitive Capable

Spiffed Up

This is the kids pre-church on Easter morning. You'll note there are no post-church pictures.


Here they are after the Easter egg hunt on Saturday. This is more how they usually appear.


A good Easter, at least so far. The morning opened with the traditional scavenger hunt for the baskets. I have rued the day I devised this tradition. I appear to be stuck with it for at least 14 more years. I'm running out of clues guys!
We had breakfast (candy), got cleaned up, dressed and to church where the kids ate more candy.
Dh had to work but the kids and I had a nice lunch with pop in wine glasses, at least they had pop, lamb, rolls, corn, broccoli, fruit salad and candy. Do you sense a theme here?

After Mel wakes up from her much needed nap we will have an Easter egg hunt in the back yard. I am tempted to fill the eggs with carrots and grapes but noooooo, it'll be candy.

Cry Out To Jesus
Words by Mac Powell / Music by Third Day
To everyone who's lost someone they love
Long before it was their time
You feel like the days you had were not enough
when you said goodbye

And to all of the people with burdens and pains
Keeping you back from your life
You believe that there's nothing and there is no one
Who can make it right

There is hope for the helpless
Rest for the weary
Love for the broken heart
There is grace and forgiveness
Mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are
Cry out to Jesus, Cry out to Jesus

For the marriage that's struggling just to hang on
They lost all of their faith in love
They've done all they can to make it right again
Still it's not enough

For the ones who can't break the addictions and chains
You try to give up but you come back again
Just remember that you're not alone in your shame
And your suffering

When your lonely
And it feels like the whole world is falling on you
You just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus
Cry to Jesus

To the widow who struggles with being alone
Wiping the tears from her eyes
For the children around the world without a home
Say a prayer tonight

(c) 2005 Consuming Fire Music / ASCAP. All rights administered by EMI
CMG Publishing. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Round Up

Ds went to kindergarten round up Wednesday night. (As an aside, this always makes me sing 'head 'em up, move 'em out, RAWHIDE' in my head) He loved the bus ride around the parking lot and looking in the lockers. I'm not all that happy to see another one getting bigger. I also suggested to the principal, when he came around mingling, that a margarita booth at the next school carnival would be nice. I'm sure I added another asterisk by my name on the "Parents Who Are Trouble" list.

S ran in his first track meet last night too. He did all right. A solid middle of the packer. They run 6th, 7th and 8th grade all together. His skinny 6th grade self didn't stand a chance against some of the 8th graders who darn near looked like full grown men.

The kids are home tomorrow. After a thrilling visit to the orthodontist I think we'll dye eggs. Church in the evening. Dh is working so I'm pretty sure after taking all 6 to a packed church service I will be feeling less than christian. Maybe we'll all do shots of benedryl before we go.

It's Over *sob*

We finished spring break week with a bang. Saturday dh and I went out for coffee then I took 7 and 4yo to Easter bunny story time while 10 and 14yo roamed the stacks. After we had our Easter eggs and bunny pictures we played outside until it was time to pick up 12yo from his Boy Scout camping trip where he had a good time. Sunday morning the kids did the palm waving thing which is always cute and then we went to a baseball game. Go Fort Wayne Wizards. Three hours in the sun eating junk seems to have really worn them down. I'm hoping for baths and bed.

This is how Mel appeared after nap time yesterday. Not just everyone could wear this look.



Just adding, is there much that is cuter than that first pink cheeked sun kissed nose of the season. The only thing that comes close is a 4yo who whispers "Mommy, you're beautifuller than Jasmine." That boy's silver tongue will take him far.

Happy Birthday to the Test Model

E turned 14 today. That does not seem possible. I took her and one of her good friends out to lunch and shopping. So far the teen years haven't been bad. Of course there are six long years to go. E is a goal oriented, generally mature kid. She is in everything. She is a straight A student, belongs to student council, campus life, student leaders, choir and band. She ran cross country, plays basketball and softball and takes dance. She is also a voracious reader. It is nice to have someone who actually likes hanging out in book stores and libraries with me. I didn't take her picture today,(she got cake with lunch and so I didn't make one). This was taken last summer.

Hmmm

First I write a post that doesn't appear, then it appears three times, now it's gone again.

Spring Break!

The kids are officially on spring break. Yeah!! They seem pretty burned out (and I could use a break from homework help/poster board delivery myself). Unlike what seems like 75% of the people we know we will not be going to Florida, Carolina, Alabama or anywhere else sunny, sandy and resort like. We do have more things we want to do than time I think. They have mentioned going to friends/friends staying here, baseball games, movies, shopping, library trips, the zoo or the children's museum, Pizza Hut or Ponderosa, hiking and parks. Considering I also scheduled eye appointment, shot appointments and the dire need to get dd some jeans it sounds like a full schedule. E's birthday is coming up next Friday but since her friends have fled to the above mentioned warmer latitudes her party will be postponed. I'm considering a trip to the wine shop just in case the weather turns miserable and they are stuck inside playing too much gamecube and getting on each others nerves.